Halloween is just around the corner, so we are sure you must be busy preparing creepy costumes to scare the wits out of everyone while going trick-or-treating! But Halloween doesn’t always have to be about the scare. It is also a perfect time to crack some funny jokes, especially when terror and horror get too much to handle. So if you are in search for some relief, you might want to take a look at our collection of Halloween jokes for kids!
Halloween Jokes For Kids
Just like all the holidays, even Halloween has its share of jokes and pretty good ones! Below we have some really cool Halloween jokes, puns, and one-liners for kids that everyone will enjoy!
1. And That’s What We Call A Skeleton Gourmand!
Q: What do skeletons say before they start dining?
A: Bone Appetit!
2. Consider This A Hack!
Q: What is the best way to fix a broken jack-o-lantern?
A: By using a pumpkin patch!
3. Oh, Poor Ghost Is Sick!
Q: How can you tell if a ghost has a horrible cold?
A: By his deep loud coffin!
4. That’s A Novel Way To Start A Letter, Isn’t It?
Q: How would vampires start their letters?
A: “Tomb it may concern…”.
5. Dracula’s Dog!
Q: Which is the most favorite dog breed of Dracula?
A: Blood hound!
6. Let’s Do The Monster Math!
Q: Which Halloween monster is best at Mathematics?
A: No one, unless you Count Dracula!
7. Yes, Even Ghosts Apply Makeup!
Q: What base do female ghosts use before applying makeup?
A: Vanishing cream!
8. A Holiday For Vampires! This Is What We Call Equality!
Q: What would be the national holiday if vampires had a nation?
9. This Is Sooo Creepy!
Q: What did one thirsty vampire say to the other while passing the morgue?
A: Let’s stop in for a cool one
10. They Like It Traditional!
Q: What is the favorite main course dish of Italian ghosts?
11. Something Everyone With A Weak Eyesight Needs!
Q: What do ghosts wear when their eyesight gets weak?
12. We’ve Got Some Skeleton Teachers As Well!
A baby ghost while narrating a day at school to his father- “We have two skeleton teachers at school. While one is humerus, the other is very sternum”. (We’ve included links to help you understand the joke better.)
13. Would You Dare To Write A Story At A Cemetery?
Boy 1: I think a cemetery is the best place to write a story.
Boy 2: Why?
Boy 1: Because it has so many plots!
14. That Was Pretty Obvious!
Q: What is the first thing witches ask on arriving at hotels?
A: Broom service!
15. Teaching Baby Ghosts Some Manners!
Q: What did mommy ghost say when baby ghost kept interrupting the conversation?
A: “Spook when you’re spooken to.”
16. All In Vain!
Q: What has thousands of ears, but cannot hear a single thing?
A: A cornfield!
17. And It’s Loads Of Fun!
Q: What Are The Favorite Rides Of Ghosts At The Carnival?
A: The rollerghoster and scary-go-round!
18. Harvested Especially For Vampires!
Q: Which is the most favorite fruit of a vampire?
19. It’s Their Area Of Expertise!
Q: Which genre of music does a mummy excel in?
20. Just A Heads Up In Case You’re Planning To Have Some Tea At A Skeleton’s House!
Skeletons usually serve coffee and tea in bone china. Just make sure to watch out for chips!
21. Even Monsters Need Love!
Q: What does the ghost call his true love?
A: My ghoul-friend.
22. The Skeleton Is A Cleanliness Freak!
Q: What would you call a cleaning skeleton?
A: A ‘grim sweeper’.
23. Earlier, He Was Short, Now, He’s Short And Lean!
Q: Who is the favorite historical ruler of skeletons?
A: Napoleon Bone-a-part!
24. Let Us Warn You, It’s Not Really A Great Idea!
Q: How would you get inside a cemetery at night if it’s locked?
A: By unlocking the gates with skeleton key!
25. Interesting Name, Isn’t It?
Q: What is the name of the witch residing in the desert?
26. That’s A No Brainer, Isn’t it?
Q: What is a werewolf’s favorite Cub Scout event?
A: Pack meetings, of course!
27. Made You Laugh!
Q: Why are skeletons best at comedy?
A: Because they have a funny bone!
28. Mummies Should Try To Open Themselves, But Not Literally!
Q: Why mummies do not have friends?
A: Because they’re too wrapped up in themselves!
29. And Now, We’re Feeling Bad For The Skeletons!
Q: Why didn’t the skeletons like the candy?
A: Because they did not have the stomach for it!
30. Ghosts Are Plant Friendly, But Humans Are Not!
Q: Which is the most favorite plant of ghosts?
31. A Plot Idea For Disney!
Q: What do you get if you cross Bambi with a ghost?
32. Imagine The Flight Of The Poor Thing!
Q: What would be worse than being a six-ton witch?
A: Being her broom!
33. So We Finally Have Their Address!
Q: What part of street do vampires reside?
A: The dead end!
34. He Could Give Some Stiff Competition In A Dance Show!
Q: Which ghost is the best dancer?
A: The Boogie Man!
35. Unfortunately, They Are And No Matter How Hard We Try To Stop Them, We Can’t!
Q: Why do they put fences around graveyards?
A: Because people are dying to get in!
36. Creepy Sea Creature!
Q: What do you call a monster with no neck?
A: The Lost Neck Monster.
37. Corny, But Still Funny!
Q: What Is The Favorite Room Of A Ghost?
A: Living room!
38. Noisy Cemeteries!
Q: Why are graveyards always so noisy?
A: Because of all the coffin.
39. Wish We Could Do The Same With Humans!
Q: What did the ghost say when the skeleton lied to him?
A: I can see right through you.
40. Just Hope They Accept You!
Q: What do you do if you wish to learn more about Dracula?
A: You join his fang club.
41. Scared Skeleton!
Q: Why was the skeleton afraid of the storm?
A: Because he just didn’t have any guts!
42. We Were Totally Not Expecting This!
Q: What do you call a kind and considerate monster?
A: A complete failure.
43. This Halloween Joke For Kids Made Us ROFL!
Q: What do you call a vampire that lives in a kitchen?
A: Count Spatula.
44. When The Weather Outside Gets Frightful!
Q: What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
45. Feeling Bad For Dracula!
Q: What do you call when a vampire is having trouble with his house?
A: A grave problem.
46. At Least He’s Satiated!
Q: How do you know a vampire was in the bakery?
A: When you find the jelly sucked out of doughnuts.
47. The Skeleton Being Chased!
Q: Why did the skeleton climb up the tree?
A: Because a dog was after his bones!
48. It Would Dampen Ours Too!
Q: Why don’t ghosts like rain on Halloween?
A: Because it would dampen their spirits!
49. It Happens To Be A Variation Of Mozzarella!
Q: What’s is the most favorite cheese of a goblin?
50. Graveyard Recess!
Q: What is a recess at a graveyard called?
A: A Coffin Break!
51. Mother, In Any Form, Is Caring!!
Q: Why did the monster’s mother knit him three socks for Halloween?
A: She heard her son grew another foot!
52. Couch Potato!
Q: Where do skeletons like to binge-watch their favorite show?
A: On the skelelvision!
53. That’s How Gentlemen Behave!
Two monsters were enjoying themselves at a Halloween party when one saw a lady roll her eyes to him? He asked his friend, “What should I do?”
The friend replied, “Be a gentleman and roll them back to her.”
54. That Would Be An Unpleasant Crossover!
Q: What would you get if you crossed a vampire and a teacher?
A: Lots of blood tests!
55. Witch’s Spell (Pun Intended)
Q: What is the easiest way to make a witch itch?
A: Take away the W.
56. A Demon’s Best Friend!
Q: Why are demons and ghouls always found hanging out together?
A: Because demons are a ghoul’s best friend! (Refers to the slogan, diamonds are a girl’s best friend.)
57. Mouse Have No Option, But To Be Superstitious!
Q: When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?
A: When you’re a mouse.
58. So We Have A Technologically Advanced Skeleton!
Q: Why didn’t the skeleton like talking on the rotary skelephone?
A: Because he preferred his cell bone!
59. But Most Pumpkins Are Fat, Isn’t It?
Q: What do you call a fat pumpkin?
A: A plumpkin.
60. This Horseman Seems Workaholic!
Q: Why did the headless horseman go into business?
A: He wanted to get ahead in life.
61. A Brilliant Idea For Those Looking For This Monster!
Q: How would you communicate with the Loch Ness Monster?
A: Drop him a line.
62. A Ghost’s Favorite Vacation Spot!
Q: Which is the most favorite vacation destination of a host?
63. Mummies Can Be Really, Really Busy!
Q: Why don’t mummies take time off?
A: They’re afraid to unwind.
65. Halloween Riddle For Kids!
Q: What is the name of the product that the maker does not want, the buyer does not use, and the user does not see?
A: A coffin.
66. Vampires Are Also Intellectual!
Q: Why did the Vampire read the New York Times?
A: He heard it had great circulation.
67. That’s One Easy Way To Differentiate!
Q: How would you differentiate good monsters from bad ones?
A: If the monster was good, you will be able to talk about it later!
68. Dracula Has Arrived!
Q: How do vampires move around the town on Halloween?
A: On blood vessels
69. One Benefit Of Being Skinny!
Q: Do you know why skeletons are so calm?
A: Because nothing gets under their skin.
70. The Best Bat Contest!
One day, Dracula decided to hold a competition between his bats to decide who is best among them. The competition was that the bat who brings most blood in the least time would be the winner.
The first bat went and came in 10 minutes with mouth covered in blood. Dracula was mighty impressed and asked him how he did it. The bat replied, “ I went to the house behind the tower and drank the blood of everyone in the family”. Dracula replied, “very good.”
The second bat was even faster and came back within 5 minutes with blood all over his face. Dracula was shocked this time and asked how did he do it? “There’s a hotel behind the tower”, the bat said. “ I went in and drank the blood of everyone in the hotel”. Dracula exclaimed, “fantastic”.
The third bat went and came in just 1 minute with blood all over his body. Dracula couldn’t believe his eyes as asked, “how did you do it?”. The bat replied, “Do you see the tower there?” “Yes,” said the Dracula. “But I didn’t see it”, said the bat!
71. Even Monsters Are Superstitious!
Q: How do monsters tell their future?
A: They read their horrorscope.
72. A Perfect Frankenstein Joke For Kids!
What happened to Frankenstein’s monster when he hit the road with his car?
He was stopped for speeding, fined $100 and dismantled for six months.
73. The Doctor Decided To Take An Off And Save His Life!
Doctor: Who’s my next patient?
Nurse: Mr. Ghost.
Doctor: Tell him I can’t see right now.
74. Sorry For Laughing At This One!
Patient: Doctor, I think that I’ve been bitten by a vampire.
Doctor: Okay, quickly drink this glass of water.
Patient: Will it make me better?
Doctor: No, but I’ll be able to see if there’s any leak from the neck.
75. Like I Said Before, Mothers Are Same Everywhere!
What did the mother ghost say to the baby ghost while they were driving down the street?
Buckle your sheet belt!
76. This Is So Creepy!
Two men, while walking home after a Halloween, decided to visit the cemetery, just for fun. While they were walking inside, they heard a tapping noise coming from the shadow. They started trembling with fear and were about to run when they saw an old man with a chisel and hammer, doing something with the headstone. “Oh Mister, you scared us to death”, said one man. “We thought you were a ghost! But what are you doing here”? “Those fools, I tell you!”, the old man grumbled. “They misspelled my name!”
77. Becky Is Smart!
Just a few days after Halloween, Becky came home with a disappointing report card. Her mother was furious and asked why her grades were so low.
Becky answered, “Because everything is marked down after holidays!”
78. Knock Knock Halloween Joke For Kids!
Bea-ware, tonight is Halloween!
79. Just Hope For The Best.
Q: What would you do if you find 50 zombies surrounding your house?
A: Just hope that it’s Halloween…
80. Technically, He Is Right!
On a Halloween night, a young ghost went trick or treating. Seeing him alone, the neighbor asked, “Who are your parents”?
He answered, “Deady and Mummy”.
81. We Have Sorted The Menu For Breakfast!
Q: What do ghosts eat for breakfast on Halloween?
A: Shrouded Wheat. Scream of Wheat. Ghost Toasties. Rice Creepies. Terr-fried eggs.
You must have screamed with laughter while reading all these Halloween jokes. Do your bit and share these Halloween jokes and one-liners with your friends so that even they can laugh their lungs out. And if you know any more Halloween jokes for children, let us know by commenting below. We will be more than happy to add them to our list.